Setting boundaries in recovery is crucial as it can help prevent relapse. Young people may have trouble setting boundaries with friends for fear of hurting their relationships. But if a friend is worth keeping, they will respect these boundaries and encourage sobriety. We will examine the importance of setting boundaries during recovery and what types of boundaries should be set to have the most effective results.
Why Boundaries in Recovery Are Necessary
Boundaries in recovery are necessary because they help young people avoid situations that could lead to relapse. They also help establish healthy relationships by clearly stating what is needed to avoid confusion.
When teens and young adults set boundaries, it helps to promote self-care, which is crucial to recovery. Knowing when to step back and take a timeout can help to keep people on a sober path. When neglect settles in, it can cause situations and feelings that could result in poor choices.
Setting boundaries also shows control and can help boost self-esteem, as it shows that you are taking steps to control your life.
Setting Boundaries in Recovery: What They Look Like
There are several things that young people can do to ensure their recovery as they learn to live a sober life.
Stay Away from People and Places That May Trigger Relapse
One of the most important boundaries that can be set is to steer clear of people and places that can trigger relapse. If there is a friend who tends to drink and use substances, staying away from them can be the best defense during recovery and beyond. Setting a boundary that you won’t interact with them or visit places associated with your substance use can help to keep you on a sober path.
Limit Social Media Use with Friends
Teens love to use social media apps to communicate. But, doing so can be harmful to the recovery process. Researchers found that teens who use social media are more apt to use marijuana, tobacco, and alcohol compared to teens who are not on social media platforms.[1] During recovery, limiting social media use can help teens to avoid substances.
Say No to Peer Pressure
Peer pressure is a leading risk factor for underage drinking and other drug use, so saying no to peers is one of the most important boundaries that young people can set.[2] If a friend continues to put on the pressure to use substances, then it may be time to look for new friends. These friends obviously have no respect for the boundary set or the recovery process. They are also harming their health.
Clearly Communicate Needs
One way to set boundaries is to communicate needs clearly. If a young person needs to miss a social event to attend a support group to help in the recovery, friends and family need to respect that. They won’t know what you need unless you clearly let them know.
Common Challenges to Setting Boundaries
It is common to face many challenges as you work to set boundaries. You may be afraid to set boundaries because of the potential reaction you may receive. You may also feel guilty for prioritizing your needs.
Others may find it difficult to challenge people and belief systems that lead to their addiction. The important thing to remember is that setting boundaries is a learning process. As you set boundaries, you will learn how to do so effectively to get the results you deserve.
What Happens When Boundaries Are Not Respected?
There may come a time when friends don’t respect the boundaries that are set. This does not indicate failure on your part. What it does mean is that it’s time to step away. Recovery is the priority, and if others do not respect your wishes to help you on that path, it’s likely time to part ways. You need all the support you can get during this time.
Having your boundaries disrespected can lead to low self-esteem, which can take you down a dangerous path. For many, low self-esteem can lead to substance use. While it may be difficult to stand by your boundaries, you will respect your decision down the road as you work to maintain your sobriety.
Seek Help for Substance Use Disorders at Ember Recovery
Ember Recovery is here to provide the best substance use treatment programs for adolescents and youth in the Iowa area. To date, our team has helped over 5,000 teens across Iowa achieve the sober life they deserve. Our programs are specifically for teens and young adults so that we can address the specific issues they face as they battle their substance use disorder.
Contact the team at Ember Recovery today to learn more about our treatment programs.
Sources:
[1] https://www.jahonline.org/article/S1054-139X(17)30158-1/pdf [2] https://store.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/pep23-03-01-006.pdf
Andrea Dickerson is a Licensed Therapist and Certified Substance Use Counselor who has worked in behavioral health since 1997. Currently, Andrea is the Director of Behavioral Health, overseeing the Ember residential treatment programs and YSS outpatient counseling clinics throughout Central and North Central Iowa. She became a Motivational Interviewing (MI) trainer in 2006 and provides MI trainings throughout Iowa.
Andrea specializes in working with adolescents and their families and enjoys seeing the family relationships grow through therapy. Andrea is also a CARF International Surveyor, going around North America ensuring behavioral health organizations are meeting required standards.
In her free time, Andrea enjoys cheering on the Iowa Hawkeyes and Chicago Cubs, as well as being an active member of Soroptimist International of the Americas (SIA), a global organization that provides women and girls with access to the education and training they need to achieve economic empowerment. She has been a member of the SI of Des Moines club since 2012 and has been actively involved at the regional level, currently serving as Co-Governor of the Peaks to Plains Region.
Through her involvement in SIA, Andrea has been actively involved in the Dream Programs, coordinating annual Dream It, Be It: Career Support for Girls projects, which give girls the tools they need to achieve their education and career goals, empowering them to break cycles of poverty, violence, and abuse.